FNP__FNP DENIES INTEREST IN PURCHASING TIMES
Faux News Press (FNP)__Washington, DC__A highly placed source associated with the management of FNP would neither confirm nor deny that Faux News Press was involved in private discussions with Arthur Sulzberger Jr., Chairman of the New York Times Co., regarding the purchase of all shareholdings of the Sulzberger family. The exciting, youthful FNP has been considering expansion into the New York & Boston marketplaces, according to usually reliable sources near management, and the stodgy New York Times is desperately in need of new ideas. As one highly-placed executive at FNP quipped: “Even tanna leaves won’t bring The Times to life, but we’ll see what we can do.” The cocky young journal has “wowed” the petrified media establishment.
Leading members of the Bilderberger establishment have been queried how the change in ownership might affect future clan gatherings. None have chosen to speak either on or off the record. [Note: media moguls regularly attend clan meetings, which are held at posh resorts around the world. They take a "vow of silence."]
The same question was asked of leading members of the Council on Foreign Affairs. Mr. David Gergen admitted that the subject had raised apprehensive responses from several key members, but noted that the focus of the CFA was foreign issues, such as how to raise the price of a barrel of oil to $100 per barrel, and how to institute a United Nations “head” tax by means of evolution from a simple “excise” tax.
Parenthetically, according to Mr. Gergen, it is the latter tax issue which has lead many prominent members of the CFA and Bilderberger clanmeetings to support Mr. Barack H. Obama for president, as Mr. Obama is known to favor a world tax, instituted by means of U.N. treaty-making powers, which transfers needed currency to the poorer nations, as found in Africa and in the Third World generally.
Although Mr. Arthur Sulzberger has denied that the Sulzberger family was interested in selling out their shares, reliable observers have confirmed “unrest” in the family and a desire to get “top dollar” now, while they still could. The New York Times Co. also owns the Boston Globe and International Herald Tribune. Its share price was recently quoted at $20. Family members are known to fear “penny stock” status. One well-known Sulzberger-family watcher has stated flatly that there exists “all but civil war” within the family.
When Moody’s Investor Service lowered the Times’s debt to one grade above “junk” status, the price of Times shares seemed certain to fall–perhaps steeply.
Why, then, would Faux News Press wish to make an offer? One insider mused: “These are name products which can be exploited in new ways.”
FNP is not the only rumored purchaser of the antique Times. Both the Israeli World View, which is said to be controlled by the Mossad in conjunction with certain “Russian” Moguls, as well as New York Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg are said to be interested in the Times.
All rights reserved. Nomoonnight, 2008
